I’m back with a brand new segment of Comics Casting Couch.  This time around, I’ve picked an epic story: the seminal Batman classic, No Man’s Land.  Instead of talking about each actor and actress and why I think they’re perfect, I’m going to simply give you three roles the actor or actress has proven his or her merit and showcased his or her talent worthy of donning the makeup (or even capes and cowls) of our favorite characters.  So, without any further hesitation, here it is!

 

The Plot
The late 1990s/early 2000s Batman epic could easily be broken into a profitable trilogy, possibly even rivaling the Christopher Nolan Dark Knight series. The first part, tentatively called Cataclysm, would feature the earthquake, the declaration of Gotham City as an official No Man’s Land, the Penguin taking control over the food and water supply, and various Batman family run-ins with villains along the likes of Poison Ivy, Scarecrow, Mr. Freeze, and Clayface. The second part, tentatively called No Man’s Land, would feature the chaos, the introduction of the new Batgirl alongside her parents, David Cain and Lady Shiva, featuring Two-Face as the primary antagonist (and reluctant ally), as well as a sinister Joker cameo appearance leading into the final act. The climax, tentatively titled, Endgame, would feature the holidays, unlikely allies in former villains such as Bane and Lex Luthor, helping rebuild Gotham all while Harley Quinn and the Joker stop at nothing to ensure the city’s immortal status of hell on earth.

 

The Creators
Why not get a director with enough clout to not only bill this as a trilogy from the get-go, but actually deliver such an epic tale in a way that pleases both fans of the comics as well as your everyday moviegoer? In order to do that, you’d need someone like Ron Howard, aided by comic writers (serving as screenwriters) such as Chuck Dixon, Devin Grayson, and Greg Rucka. Throw a half-dozen A-list Hollywood producers into the mix, and you’ve got a recipe for the biggest superhero extravaganza the world has ever seen. Accomplish this over the course of a decade and you’ll have even the strongest of critics saying “Who’s Christopher Nolan?”

 

Eric Bana as Bruce Wayne, Batman
Deadfall, Hanna, and Troy

Kate Mara as Barbara Gordon, Oracle (former Batgirl)
House of Cards, HappyThankYouMorePlease, and American Horror Story

Ian Somerhalder as Dick Grayson, Nightwing (former Robin)
The Vampire Diaries, The Rules of Attraction, and Lost

Ezra Miller as Tim Drake, Robin
We Need to Talk about Kevin, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, and Another Happy Day

Anthony Hopkins as Alfred Pennyworth
Legends of the Fall, Hearts in Atlantis, and Hitchcock

Glenn Close as Dr. Leslie Thompkins
Damages, Fatal Attraction, and The Shield

Harrison Ford as Commissioner Jim Gordon
Air-Force One, Blade Runner, and Paranoia

Julianne Moore as Lt. Sarah Essen-Gordon
Magnolia, Hannibal, and 6 Souls

Jude Law as the Joker
Road to Perdition, A. I., and Closer

Cameron Diaz as Dr. Harleen Quinzel, Harley Quinn
Vanilla Sky, Any Given Sunday, and Knight & Day

Robert DeNiro as Oswald Cobblepot, the Penguin
The Fan, Cape Fear, and The Godfather Part II

Guy Pearce as Harvey Dent, Two-Face
Lawless, L. A. Confidential, and Memento

Javier Bardem as Bane
Skyfall, No Country for Old Men, and Collateral

Neve Campbell as the Helena Berinelli, the Huntress
Scream, Medium, and Party of Five

Zachary Quinto as Jean-Paul Valley, Azrael
Star Trek, Heroes, and Margin Call

Ming-Na Wen as Lady Shiva
The Joy Luck Club, Mulan, and ER

Robert Redford as David Cain
The Company You Keep, Spy Game, and Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Jamie Chung as Cassandra Cain, Batgirl
Sucker Punch, Sorority Row, and Once Upon a Time

Vera Farmiga as Dr. Pamela Isley, Poison Ivy
Bates Motel, Running Scared, and The Departed

Jeffrey Dean Morgan as Basil Karlo, Clayface
Supernatural, Watchmen, and The Losers

Vin Diesel as Dr. Victor Fries, Mr. Freeze
The Chronicles of Riddick, The Fast and the Furious, and Saving Private Ryan

Matthew Goode as Dr. Jonathon Crane, Scarecrow
Stoker, Watchmen, and Burning Man

And Bryan Cranston as Lex Luthor
* Argo, Cold Comes the Night, and Breaking Bad

So there it is! My casting for a movie that lots of people in the industry claim can’t (or won’t) be made. What do you think? Sound off below or yell at me on twitter. I’d love to hear your thoughts and argue with you!

See you next time on Comics Casting Couch… I’ll save you a seat.