Clayton Carmine sings the blues

Waking up at 6:30am on a Sunday morning is not fun, end of story; nonetheless, I decided to hit the ground running today, and, upon sifting through my usual emails regarding Amazon deals, childrens clothing sales, and Bank Of America reminding me that I’m not a millionaire yet, I came across an email from a friend of mine with a link to Epic Games’ community page. What you see before you is Gears of War fan, Dale Harvey, singing his re-write of “Sixteen Tons” by Merle Travis which he has fittingly titled “Sixteen Grubs”. According to his Youtube post, he didn’t expect the  reaction this has gotten from the community and his next plans are to write a song about bacon. Now who is going to argue with that? I’ve snagged the lyrics from the Epic Games Community Page if anyone wants to sing along like I did:

Sixteen Grubs Lyrics – by Dale Harvey

 

Some people say a COG is made outta mud
But that poor soul made outta muscle and blood
Muscle and blood and skin like stone
A aim that’s true and a heart that’s strong

 

You kill sixteen grubs, what do you get
Another day living and closer to death
Saint Fenix don’t you call me ’cause I won’t go
until stalks and E-Holes don’t show up no more

 

I was born on E-Day when the sun didn’t shine
I picked up my lancer and I walked to the line
I cut up sixteen grubs and as their blood ran cold
Right under our feet opened another E-Hole

 

You kill sixteen grubs, what do you get
Another day living and closer to death
Saint Fenix don’t you call me ’cause I won’t go
until stalks and E-Holes don’t show up no more

 

I was blessed by the COG to bring thunder and pain
Curb Stomping and Sawing were my claim to fame
I trained hand to hand by Bernie the lion
Can’t no damn locust queen make me walk the line

 

You kill sixteen grubs, what do you get
Another day living and closer to death
Saint Fenix don’t you call me ’cause I won’t go
until stalks and E-Holes don’t show up no more

 

If you see my squad coming’, better run and hide
A lotta grubs didn’t, a lotta grubs died
One blade of iron, one round of steel
If the blade don’t get ya the round sure will

 

You kill sixteen grubs, what do you get
Another day living and closer to death
Saint Fenix don’t you call me ’cause I won’t go
until stalks and E-Holes don’t show up no more

Tags: Epic Games, funny, Gears of War 3, GoW

About the Author

Written by Joshua Otis

I once had wealth, power, and the love of a beautiful woman. Now I only have two things: my friends, and... uh... my thermos. Huh? My story? Okay. It was never easy for me. I was born a poor black child. I remember the days, sittin' on the porch with my family, singin' and dancin' down in Mississippi... Ok so I actually live in Baltimore, MD and have been playing video games as long as I can remember. It all started with my mom giving me $5 to play the old Afterburner arcade game and the rest is history. Aside from gaming I'm an avid cinephile(as you can tell from the quote from "The Jerk") and "urban explorer".

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